Say Hello To Freedom!
Thursday, 6 November 2014
The Anxiety Monster Part 4 - Messy Home, Messy Brain
If the house is untidy and the dishes unwashed, or the garden uncared for I personally find it makes me more disorganised which doesn't help my anxiety & stress levels.
Finding the motivation or energy to do these chores - is hard work - being told to "get up off your arse and do something" by people that think the tough love approach works - have NO IDEA what they are talking about, they don't get that stress, anxiety, panic attacks, social phobia and depression are all intricately bound together in various ways - and like the Wack 'a' Mole game - a person sensitive to their emotions - can have anyone of these little monsters come out and claim to be King of the brain they have hijacked.
A way to overcome the objection to moving from the sitting position to the standing up one and taking action about your house, can be to give yourself a goal or a treat - I know that might sound like you are a dog, that works for scooby snacks - but I have a dog, and I think she has a point in some cases, doing chores for a reward of some sort does work :-) so try it.
For example I have a messy house at the moment - the way I have talked myself into tidying up - is I ordered some things online (dose of retail therapy) from my supplier and I am not going to allow myself to open the box of goodies until I have got my house in order.
Chores I will do:
Wiping down surfaces, emptying bins, putting paper work in piles, ready to be sorted through, hoovering and making the bed - I don't stop to read the paper work or I would end up distracted from my task, my task is to create a clean and orderly space so that when I open my reward I am focused on it and not surrounded by clutter - I know all the paper work is - in one pile - over there, rather than scattered EVERYWHERE.
Some order reduces anxiety in my case - which is why I promote tidying up, to increase your FOCUS ON LIFE AS AN ORDERLY THING!
Not everything is chaos, chaos is needed for creativity, but learning to manage some order is also needed in my opinion - to deal with the stress monster - setting boundaries, telling it, you will have a reward WITH ME when WE do those chores and not before.
The monster isn't adverse to a challenge, in my experience so challenge your beast occasionally - make it work for you, rather than YOU being its slave!
Anxiety holds a person down, holds them back, like you've been duck taped to the sofa or wrapped up in a million elastic bands - any of these feelings/ descriptions sound familiar? - you are welcome to share your description of anxiety below in the comments.
Its taken me years to articulate some of the feelings into words - I am still stumped if somebody asks a question like "wot u on about?" - learning to switch off from abstract questions like that, is also a skill that needs constant use, I will looking into it on another blog.